


Spare Change

by SpaceTrash (lavlonglovefin)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Awkward Relationship, Group chat, M/M, Text log, Texting, brief mention of nsfw, i ??? have no idea, klangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 19:40:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9008299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavlonglovefin/pseuds/SpaceTrash
Summary: There are a lot of things Keith expected to experience during college. Mind numbing lectures, cramming his body full of caffeine to endure dead week, the sheer amount of all-nighters. Perhaps the most unexpected thing was Lance’s impact in such a short amount of time.Brief chronicle Keith’s Junior year from March-July though dates not explicitly stated.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [luullaby](https://archiveofourown.org/users/luullaby/gifts).



> They said write about what you know. It'll be fun, they said.  
> Merry Christmas to Luullaby, I hope you enjoy!

     Keith didn’t like change. Not in the sort of way that it was an inconvenience, more of the anxiety inducing tears that threatened to spill over at the thought of it. Thanks anxiety, you’re a real great friend to have around. Okay, sure, he can roll with the punches- a quiz moved from Thursday to Tuesday in chemistry, change of dinner plans with the squad, not too big of a deal. But the thought of telling Lance-- not only his lab partner but one of his best friends-- how he felt? About the feelings he’d been ignoring for the past two months, since he first saw him in class and got to know the dork? How his heart skipped a beat everytime his name flashed across his phone screen, or how his gaze lingered a little too long when he wasn’t looking with this urge to take his hands and just kiss him? All over? Absolutely not. The entire dynamic of the group would change. Keith didn’t like change and this was no exception.

     Glancing at his phone, best DAD to Group Therapy flashed across the screen; a message from Shiro. It was unusual for him to start the initial conversation of the day in their chat, but Keith didn’t linger on it as he opened the app with a lazy flick of his index finger. Anything to pass the time in this lecture.

 _[11:19]_ **best DAD:** ice cream??? 2night at mine

 _[11:19]_ **dab king:** vidya games

 _[11:19]_ **dab king:** ??

 _[11:20]_ **Best DAD:** yes

 _[11:21]_ **shaggy:** k im in

 _[11:21]_ **shaggy:** if it’s mint chocolate chip

 _[11:21]_ **hack attack:** rocky road is better

 _[11:22]_ **hunk o burnin love:** sorry man, date night with Shay! Going to see tht new movie with the turtles??

 _[11:22]_ **MOM best:** awwww !! have fun !!

 _[11:23]_ **dab king:** just like that, our trio down 2 2

 _[11:23]_ **shaggy:** did u just

 _[11:24]_ **dab king:** fite me nerd

 _[11:29]_ **best DAD:** neither it’s neapolitan

 _[11:29]_ **best DAD:** have a good time!! kids stop

     Ew, but okay. Keith didn’t often pass up the opportunity to hang out with his friends, even if it meant a shitty ice cream. He still had room to spare in that ‘freshman fifteen’. Overlooking the fact that he was going on his junior year and all those technicalities (was ‘junior fifteen’ a thing?).  
With the new semester having recently started, nights like these were fewer and far between. Shiro and Allura were busy with their individual thesis senior projects, working on several different papers for their culmination. Then there was Lance, who had joined the school's soccer team and was usually busy with practice when they weren’t in class. Keith wasn’t a huge sports fan but still enjoyed going with the group to Lance’s games. Not to say he wasn’t a fan of headache inducing fans or overpriced tickets, but the look on Lance’s face whenever he did something right (assumedly) made the cold nights on hard bleachers worth it.  
  
     Pidge was usually working on some kind of robotics project for class and Keith liked to stay out of their way when it came to that (more accurately, shoo’ed out of the lab with muttered words about bothering a certain McClain instead), and Hunk was usually working part time at one of the local food trucks. He liked to visit him while at work, but his wallet wasn’t quite as fond of the frequent splurges. Not that Keith didn’t already spend a majority of his time outside of class in the design lab with Professor Coran, even as an art studio major he liked to get out of the stuffy computer lab once in awhile.  
  
     It could get a little too overwhelming, sorting out different designs and sketching several different concepts at once. Sure, if time allowed it he’d love to devote his time solely to one project. But with school and those deadlines as well as the start of freelance work on the side? No way was that going to happen anytime soon.  
  
     Tipping back the last of his morning savior, going under the alias of cold brew with vanilla, Keith found his mind wandering from the lecture for the rest of the period. Art was definitely his passion, evident of his sketches in the margin of each set of notes. Usually depicting small landscapes, scenery was his favorite subject to focus on in his free time. Usually. Even without outright intention he’d found his pencil drawings taking the form of Lance Sanchez much too often for his liking. Illustrating that iconic smirk in lead, that sparkle in his eyes that Keith looked for far too often, his professors weren’t even sure if Keith noticed when he was turning in his work for grading. There was never any caption to denote whom it was depicting, they were just doodles obviously, but it would take a blind eye to ignore the affection captured with each soft stroke from his pencil.  
It wasn’t until later at lunch, Keith leaning against the counter of one of the smaller food trucks Hunk was currently manning, that he really snapped out of the daze he’d been in most of the morning.  
  
     “Long night, huh?” Hunk asks with a slight smile, plating Keith’s order and sliding it out to him. He waved away his offer of payment before setting to cleaning up after himself. “No worries, on the house.”  
  
     “Oh, hey, thanks. Yeah, I guess,” He pauses, taking a bite before continuing. Pulling out his sketchbook, he had every intention of continuing to talk with Hunk, or starting work on a commission, but after pulling out his pencil it didn’t take much time for the soft sketches to take shape. Sure, Keith could pass it off as anatomy practice, the way his most recent drawings depicted Lance on the soccer field in action, but who was he kidding. His stupid lab partner was taking up most of the space in his head and it had nothing to do with anatomy practice.  
Hunk does his job quietly, glancing over every so often at his friend deep in thought as he drew. Knowing when to give their artsy friend some space, he doesn’t approach him again until Keith is leaning back from the piece, taking another bite of food (of course, it was cold now but what did he expect).  
  
     “Lance? Looks pretty good, man, you really capture that look he has on his face when he’s focusing.” Hunk is wiping down the table next to Keith as he looks over, the slightest hint of pink brushed upon his skin.  
  
     “You think so? Thanks.” There was always something about the validation from his friends, peers, that made his heart do a little jump.  
  
     “I never noticed all those freckles, damn,” Hunk laughs softly, almost leaning over Keith’s shoulder at this point to get a closer look. If the color on Keith’s face wasn’t obvious before, it was now.  
  
     “Lance… Lance has been on my mind a lot recently.” He admits softly, knowing his trust in his close friend wasn’t misplaced. Even though Lance and Hunk were roommates, there wasn’t a chance Hunk would say anything about it unless Keith OK’ed it. “Every time I see him, my palms get sweaty and..” He trails off again, glancing up to Hunk, no other words needed just then. Good thing too, since they seemed to be stuck in his throat, refusing to give life to his feelings.  
  
     “Dude, we know. It’s pretty obvious you’ve got a crush on him, my man.” Hunk is only smiling at him, no hint of mocking in his voice. Just an observation, as if it was completely normal to say it like it was as obvious as the current weather. Completely normal to have a horrible crush on one his closest friends and to have it eating at him every damn time he thought about it. Yep.  
  
     Despite the small shock that briefly ran it’s course through his body at Hunk’s words, Keith doesn’t let it stop him from changing the subject almost as abruptly as it had come up though, and thanking Hunk for the food (delicious as always) before booking it to his next class. He hadn’t realized how close he had been cutting it to his next class, biology, until he left. Time wasn’t on the forefront of his mind as he jogged to the lab. Was he really that obvious? Was it the stolen glances at dinner, or maybe his excessive willingness to help Lance out on occasion (if needed, Keith wasn’t a terrible goalie)? Either way, it nagged at him right up to the point until he slid into the seat next to Lance right before their teacher started the lecture. He didn’t even thinking of asking Hunk if Lance himself knew until he was sitting right next to the brunet.  
  
    Keith feels his phone vibrate with a message in his pocket after a few minutes of class, but does his best to ignore it until he feels a foot nudge his own gently under the table. Glancing over at Lance, he seems intently focused on the lesson, despite his phone being right on the table beside him. Another nudge. Giving in, Keith carefully pulls out his own phone to see what was up, hopefully without catching the attention of their professor.

 _dat Boi >> o shit waddup_  
_[2:08]_ **dat Boi** : Where u been???  
_[2:15]_ **o shit waddup** : visiting hunk, lost track of time  
_[2:17]_ **dat Boi:** everything ok??  
_[2:18]_ **o shit waddup:** yeah,,, no worries  
_[2:18]_ **dat Boi:** r you free at 1 for coffee??  
_[2:21]_ **o shit waddup** : w/ everyone?  
_[2:22_ ] **dat Boi:** Just us maybe?

Keith can feel Lance glance at him, but he’s too focused on taking notes for their class to return the look. Lance was smart enough to breeze through the damn lab without paying attention, aggravating Keith to no end as he continued their conversation. But regardless, he couldn’t help the way his heart skipped rope in his chest just from reading Lance’s most recent messages. It’s not like he asking him on a date or anything. Just coffee. Between friends.  
  
     Chill out, Keith.

 _[2:23]_ **o shit waddup** : yeah, sure, the hub?  
_[2:27]_ **dat Boi:** Yeah, after classes today

     Lance himself didn’t finish until later in the evening, giving Keith a solid break between class which passed rather uneventfully, and meeting up with him later in the day. He should’ve spent the time working on his assigned homework, but ended up distracted by some street performances in the main courtyard. His sketchbook was filled with plenty of figure sketches now, plenty of models to practice with. The Hub itself was a small cafe on campus, popular for poetry nights and a solid cup of coffee between classes. The walls were a dark turquoise paired with brass fixtures and student paintings along the walls. Overall, a pretty good atmosphere for studying, if not maybe a little too expensive for the average cup of coffee. Their London Fogs though… Now those were worth the $5. Hint of lavender, some vanilla… Okay, now he was just getting carried away at the mere thought.  
  
     He had already found a seat by the window in two recliners, a small end table in between them. They were getting pretty worn, but comfy nonetheless. He had gotten there a bit before they were supposed to meet, despite taking some time in the bathroom to make sure he looked alright even if Lance had already seen him that day, taking the time to put in his order and get seated with coffee in hand, pulling out his sketchbook to keep himself occupied. Keith had every intention of actually working on his homework now, but as both his hands and mind wandered with the atmosphere of the shop, sketches of a certain sun kissed bio partner scattered upon the pages instead of meticulous notes.  
  
     “Hey, whatcha drawing?” Lance’s question breaks his concentration, his sudden appearance sending the sketchbook to close with a ‘snap’. Had he seen it? A glance up at big blue eyes and small smile told him no, he hadn’t. He was sure there would’ve been a.. Louder reaction from his friend if he had.  
  
     “Just something for class.” Keith answers easily enough with a shrug, sliding his notebook back into the messenger bag at his feet. If he hadn’t seen it there was no point in playing up a reaction, despite the hammering in his chest at the mere possibility. That was a little too close.  
  
     “Oh, cool. You should show me sometime.” He’s nonchalant about it, but Keith can feel his face heat up even at the suggestion.  
  
     “Yeah, sure, uh-” He’s about to continue when he hears Lance’s name called from the front counter. Offering a smile as apology, he stands to get his coffee. Returning a few minutes later he gestures at his mug.  
  
     “What’d you get? I’m trying one of those pumpkin spiced latte things, but it’s not as orange as I thought it would be with all the fuss.” Keith chuckles at the disappointed tug of Lance’s lips as he glances at his mug, shrugging and bringing it to his lips for a sip. “Not bad though.” Keith’s surprised he can tell under the layer of whipped cream on top.  
  
     “I got a London fog. Do you want to try it?” He offers his cup out to Lance without a second thought. “Here, I’ll trade you.”  
Lance accepts the offer without a word, a simple nod as they trade cups across the table. Keith isn’t too impressed with the artificial flavoring but it really wasn’t that bad overall.  
  
     “Gross, hope I don’t get your cooties.” Lance’s tone is light when he teases him with a trademark wink. “The lavender’s too strong for me though, I think I’ll stick with the pumpkin.” Keith shrugs as they pass the mugs back.  
  
     “That’s okay, I’m not a fan of the whipped cream on yours, actually.” At Keith’s remark Lance brings a hand to his heart, mocking pain as if it was a personal attack on his character.  
  
     “ _Anyways_ , putting your ignorant comment aside, was there something you wanted to talk about? Breathe one more word about whipped cream though, and I swear…” Lance trails off as Keith chuckles, leave it to Lance to take one moment and exaggerate it. Sometimes he wondered why he hadn’t pursued a theater major for all his added theatrics in their day to day lives.  
       
     “Hey, you’re the one who invited me here!” Keith starts with wide eyes and a laugh, glancing at Lance’s hands gripped around the coffee cup. Were his hands allowed to look that nice after taking such a beating on the soccer field? It should be illegal how much he wanted to lace their fingers together. “I thought you had something to say.”  
  
     “I do, but it looked like there was something more important on your mind, nerd.” Keith leans back at that, taking a sip of his drink to buy some time while thinking over what he was going to say next. He didn’t want to mess this up by letting his mouth run. He had to remind himself he actually wanted to do this in the first place. If he fucked it up the whole group dynamic might shift, the mere thought sending his stomach into nervous knots.  
  
     “Alright. Well, uh,” He pauses again. Another drink. Damn, had talking always been this hard? His tongue certainly felt too big for his mouth now. “I’ve been thinking a lot lately. And how I like spending time with you guys, like, a lot,”  
  
     “Yeah, me too,”  
  
     “Fuck, Lance, let me finish.” Lance rolls his eyes at him but doesn’t interject. “But uh, I’ve been thinking on it more than that and how much I like spending time with you in particular.” Keith pauses to gauge Lance’s reaction. It’s hard to tell when the object of his affections seemed to be just outright chugging his latte.  
  
     “Hey-- are you even listening to me?” He can’t help but feel slightly miffed, Lance seemingly outright ignoring Keith’s confession. Or at least the very start of it.  
  
     “Oh, yeah, I am.” Lance says after a moment, setting down his (now empty) mug. A hint of a whip cream mustache lingered on his upper lip before running his tongue over it with a satisfied hum. “You’re telling me how much you like me, and not just in a ‘i want to be your best friend’ way but in the sort of ‘oh my god, I can’t stay away from star player Lance McClain and need to kiss his face’ way, right?” Lance flicks his gaze from his mug to meet Keith’s gaze, smirk playing across his lips and eyes too damn blue for Keith to look away.  
Instead he takes a moment to just gape at him, feeling the blush spread across his cheeks and to the tip of his ears.  
       
     “I- I mean, sure, I guess, but do you have to put it like that?” He almost groans in the way Lance phrased it, painting him out like some kind of weird soccer fanboy.  
  
     Lance can’t help but laugh softly at Keith’s reaction, hiding his face behind his mug with one hand and the other balled on the table. Reaching out, he gently nudges Keith’s hand with his own until he relaxes, allowing Lance to take his hand in his own, rubbing small circle against the back of Keith’s hand with his thumb. The obvious surprise from Keith in the form of a coughing splutter on his drink pulls another smile from Lance.  
  
     “Hey, nerd,” Keith looks up at the nickname, biting his lower lip and glancing between Lance and their hands. He’s hesitant to get his hopes up with what comes next despite the affectionate action. “I like you too, if that wasn’t obvious. Have for awhile, I can’t believe you haven’t noticed.”  
  
     “Haven’t noticed what? Flirting? Is that what you call your teasing, or when you kick me in the shins during lab under the table? Or maybe it’s meant to be conveyed through all those stupid memes, three am calls, or kidnapping me on day trips? Or-- Wait.” What started as a somewhat heated rant quickly simmers down as the blush on his face intensifies. “Oh.” Now that the cards were laid out, quite plainly, it did seem to make more sense. Keith hadn't thought of himself as dense, but… Well, damn.

     To say the next few weeks were a blur would be an understatement. Keith had gotten into the habit of responding to Lance’s ‘dank’ memes with his own, ‘dork’ and ‘nerd’ became an affectionate term thrown around after every exasperated sigh of ‘oh my god’. Thursdays after class quickly became a pattern, spending some alone time together before joining the rest of their friends, not to mention coffee dates-- even if Keith would simply sketch while Lance listened to music in one ear and Keith’s mumbling.  
       
     Yes, at first it was different. Their overall dynamic wasn’t much different in and of itself, but their relationship.. Well, that wasn’t exactly the same as before either. It wasn’t for a few weeks after that, a particular Thursday evening at the local boardwalk while sitting on a bench overlooking the water, the sound of the waves crashing on the rocky shore drowned only by the shrieks of children playing on a pirate ship structure a bit aways. Keith would always remember the evening if only for the chill in his core during a particularly cold Spring, and perhaps for the dog that passed by in a rowboat on more than one occasion. The conversation they had was more than forgettable, a simple exchange of how uncertain they were but how strong their feelings were becoming. The reassurance that Keith wasn’t simply a rebound after Lance’s long term relationship with Nyma. Keith trusted him. Maybe change wasn’t so scary after all.  
  
     Their first kiss, later in the week, was nothing magical despite all of the romantic tales ever told had led Keith to believe. A late night at Hunk’s that left them sleeping on the couch together, comfortable enough now in front of the rest of their friends to be more affectionate around one another. A small kiss on the cheek, holding hands while on the couch, small things that led to them sharing one sleeping space. Now, for Keith, sex wasn’t something very important on his mind. If it ever passed through his train of thought at all, it was a red letter day. He didn’t mind sex, he just didn’t really care either. So to feel Lance grind slowly against his ass after Keith had shifted his ass to get comfortable, well, he wasn’t entirely sure where he had expected it to end up until Keith found himself pulled up and into a bruising kiss. In an attempt to be discreet, with Pidge sleeping on the other sofa across the small room, they had stumbled into the adjoining kitchen. Keith couldn’t forget the bite of the countertops against his hips, Lance’s hot breath against his lips before a hand rose to his throat in perhaps the most passionate first kiss he’d ever experienced, even if he tried. Oh stars, has he tried.  
  
     More time passed, Spring flowers thriving in the early warmth of Summer sun. As the season changed, so did their dynamic once more. Less flirty banter and more apologies from both parties, as Keith’s insecurities reared under anxiety over never being enough for Lance, the constant need for communication that didn’t always go too well-- talking about his problems wasn’t something Keith wasn’t entirely comfortable. Not even with his boyfriend.  
  
     Wait, boyfriend? No, they’d never defined it yet. They weren’t friends but they weren’t exactly official either, though it was unspoken between them, they were exclusive. But Lance wasn’t ready to label something so soon after Nyma, and Keith accepted it without second thought. He could wait for Lance to be ready. He was worth the wait.  
  
     It didn’t stop them from having a good time together, despite tenser moments that left both seething for days afterwards. Making out in the woods by Shiro’s apartment building became all too commonplace, masked to the others as simply a walk, nothing more-- but they knew better. It wasn’t hard to miss the way the two looked at one another before leaving, the stray hand Keith would run through Lance’s hair while he sat at his feet without even thinking as they watched a movie. For all intents and purposes, Keith was head over heels for Lance McClain.  
  
     If their first kiss wasn’t anything special, well, their first time was almost boring. Sprawled on Shiro’s spare mattress in the living room, Young Justice pulled up (Keith hadn’t watched season two after all this time, and Lance was insistent on watching it with the news of season three), and lazy kisses in between. It wasn’t until Keith was straddling Lance, hands on his chest and eagerly leaning down to kiss him as his hips rocked that he got the idea of what Lance was thinking about as he felt his excitement nudging his thigh. Show long forgotten as Lance leaned up to press kisses against his neck, leaving bruising marks between small gasps of how much he’d thought about this, Keith continued to move with him, though his heart wasn’t into it. He’d really been getting into the episode, and whatever Lance had in mind next, wasn’t exactly up his alley. Going along with it was relatively painless, and Lance was happy at the end of it, plus they got a hot shower out of it so Keith didn’t see point in grumbling when he got to sleep curled up next to his lover. Sure, their location and timing wasn’t the best, but if Shiro was oblivious then no harm done except for the small part of Keith that would never not think about that night every time he saw that damn mattress.  
  
     Love was a strong word he wasn’t keen to use, so he wouldn’t. But as weeks spent on cloud nine passed, despite struggling in classes and a grueling work week, Keith so close to slipping up every time they had a chance to be alone together, the quiet affection bursting from his every seam despite anxieties that still liked to rear their ugly heads once in awhile.  
  
     When they had another lunch date, not an unusual occurrence with their work and class schedules, Keith was more than looking forward to it. A nice shirt, new cologne, the works in an effort to still be the one to catch Lance’s attention. It wasn’t until he sat down at their usual table by the window that overlooked the harbor and Keith really looked to Lance’s somber expression that he started to worry, the knit brow and down turn of his lips so out of place.

     "Hey handsome," Lance starts with a small wave of his hand, already half way done with his usual mocha. Keith glanced at the clock to make sure Lance hadn't been waiting for him, but no, he must've just gotten there early.  
  
     Small talk was easy. It didn't involve too much thinking about why Lance had really asked him to lunch for if that look on his face was anything to go by, nor did he have to worry about saying the wrong thing. Keith liked small talk for all intents and purposes. The conversation proceeded without much of anything particularly interesting to talk about, politely going from topic to topic as the hour continued. Keith almost wasn't sure he'd heard him right when he started talking again after a brief pause as they ate.

   "--What?" Keith looked up from his to-go box of phad Thai. He couldn't have heard that right. Everything had been going so well between them and Keith was happy--

    "I think we should take a break." Lance repeated himself with a heavy sigh though he doesn't quite meet Keith's gaze when he looks up from his own curry. "Things have been great, really, and I really like you, Keith."   
    
    "But...?" Keith starts for him, brow furrowed and he already feels the start of tears as he bites the inside of his cheek. He will not cry. Not here, now now. It was just Lance, it was  _just_ Lance.

    "We're moving too fast. I mean, I just got out of a relationship with Nyma, and I  _do_ really like you. I'm just not ready for a relationship right now, Keith. We can still hang out, right? Just like before."

  _Just like before._ Without any sweet words or soft touches? Keith wasn't sure that's something he wanted with Lance, not after getting a taste of what could be.  
     
     Keith starts after a moment, realizing the hole he'd been glaring into the spot by Lance's head as everything processed. "Right, uh, yeah." He clears his throat, refusing to meet Lance's eye as he takes another bite. "That's cool, I get it. Was a little fast, huh." The turn of his gut betrays him and as he's about to stand to throw it away after his mumbling, a sudden lack of appetite, he hears his named called out after Lance's.

    Turning to see Hunk coming towards them with a stack of flyers, he reaches the table only moments later with a big grin before assessing the mood as Keith refuses to look up from his lunch, Lance's lips in a thin line as he leans back in his chair.   
  
     "Uh, I was just going to uh, show you guys these posters we made for our engineering club but--"   
  
     "No, it's fine. I was just leaving. Tell me about it later, alright big guy? It's fine." Keith clears his throat again and pats Hunks shoulder without looking back to Lance as he leaves, leaving his lunch without even thinking about it.

    The conversation itself had been brief, nothing Keith would remember later on specifically, aside from the fact they were ‘taking a break’, because they were ‘moving too fast’. To say Keith had become accustomed to their level of affection, even found himself wanting it throughout the week by thinking back on their last kiss or good cuddle, was obvious. Another change he wasn’t fond of, something throwing him off of everything he was used to.

It was easy enough, at first, sure. When they still had their time together, and brief kisses. As all good things do, that too ended soon enough. Before he realized it, Keith was learning about a date Lance had that night, the reason he wasn’t with the group on that Thursday night. He never thought heartbreak was a thing to be physically felt, but oh god did it hurt. Perhaps, if Lance hadn’t been a coward, and told him to his face, it would be a different story that had Keith silently crying on the couch and doing his best to avoid Pidge’s concerned looks, Shiro’s reassuring hand. They all seemed to have known and nobody had bothered to tell him except during a fleeting comment.  
  
     Keith never handled things too well when he was upset, ever quick to action without always thinking things through. It was no surprise when he was next out of the apartment, feet pounding the pavement until his lungs burned and the tears were gone. Maybe it had just been a one time thing-- Lance would realize how well they fit together. He wouldn’t need dates with some guy named Rolo.  
It wasn’t a one time thing. There were no more Thursday night dates between the two of them, Lance only hanging out with Keith in a group setting. Despite his persistence, he never could seem to catch the ever sociable boy alone. A month passed that left Keith stewing in his head, analyzing every moment they’d spent together. Was he a bad kisser? Too clingy? Everything had changed so damn quickly. He almost didn’t notice the STD home test kits in the drawer of Shiro’s bathroom after spending the night. He wouldn’t have thought too much about it aside from the note cards dated just the day before, and two separate tests (he wasn’t going to pry enough to check if they were positive, he’d already seen something he wasn’t supposed to, and he wasn’t sure he even wanted to know).  
  
     Had Shiro been seeing someone? Keith couldn’t think of anyone, always laughing it off when someone brought his lack of romance to attention. Really, the only one Shiro was consistently hanging out with lately for study sessions was… Lance.  
Lance McClain was sleeping with Shirogane Takashi.  
Fuck.  
  
     Keith was in no mood to confront the two of them about it, but the more he watched it was only more obvious it became. The lingering touches when they thought nobody was around, the soft smiles exchanged that Keith missed so much, and let’s not forget the late night ‘study sessions’ the two had while everyone else left for the night.  
       
     “Hey, Hunk,” It had been a feat tracking Hunk down on campus during dead week where every college student was at risk of consuming an unholy amount of caffeine, but he had finally managed to find him in the engineering building. “Pidge,” A nodded greeting towards the younger girl, grease staining her cheeks as she waved with a wrench.  
  
     “Hey dude, what’s up? Come to check out our totally awesome racer?” Hunk grinned as he stepped back from the go-kart they had been excitedly working on for the campus competition since the start of the month. Despite working in an auto shop they hadn’t asked Keith to help out with anything, which was by all means fine. Keith raised a brow as he looked it over before looking to the two of them, hands proudly on their hips.  
  
     “It’s uh, it’s a lion. A yellow one.” He stated, a small tilt of his head indicating confusion at their design choice. Otherwise, the whole thing looked pretty solid and could definitely take out of some the competition-- the thing was a tank.  
  
     “Yeah, duh, it’s our school’s mascot, dummy.” Pidge sighed while going back to working on the under carriage with a grunt.  
  
      “Oh, okay, well, cool. You’ll kick ass in that thing for sure.” A thumb ups from Hunk as he turned to adjusting bolts on the lion’s legs. “I actually came to ask about, uh, Lance. Well, and Shiro, I guess.” He clears his throat when the two of them pause, though only Hunk turns to address him.  
  
     “Yeah, what about them?” Keith doesn’t miss the way he shifts his weight, eyes darting away from Keith.  
  
      “They’re seeing each other, right?” Keith never was one to beat around the metaphorical bush.  
  
     “Well, technically, they’re sleeping together and trying to keep it unofficial or something. Isn’t it pretty obvious though?” Hunk aims a kick to Pidge’s ankle to keep her from saying anything else after that, earning a groan and sharp glare as she leans over to rub at the sore skin.  
  
     “I-- uh, yeah, I just wanted to. Y’know, make sure.” Keith clears his throat. Anger is already taking place of the dread only moments before. Of course he would find out second hand, isn’t that how it always went with Lance?  
  
     “Look buddy,” Hunk moves to put an arm around Keith’s shoulder, and as much as he wants to shrug him off and leave, he bites his tongue and stays. “I’ve known Lance for… Years.” A small shrug. “I love him, really, but he’s not the most emotionally mature guy. He’s not the most subtle either, and when he wants something…”  
  
     “So that’s it? He just.. What, throws me away like a… Like a toy soldier?” Keith exhales, a quiet growl at the back of his throat of being used in such a way. Giving everything to Lance to be tossed aside so easily.  
  
     “No, no! He definitely had feelings, has? I’m not sure. He gets scared, Keith. If things are going too well he distances himself even if he wants to stay. I’m not saying what he did was okay. Obviously he’s uh, hurt you.” Keith almost laughs. “But I’m just trying to get you to understand where he might be coming from.”  
  
     “And Shiro?” Keith asks after a moment, quiet enough Hunk almost misses it. The two were like brothers, everyone knew that.  
Hunk shakes his head, eyes downcast as he takes his own time to answer Keith’s question. Pidge’s work on the car has stilled, evident by the lack of tools sounding on metal.  
  
     “I don’t know man. I think he’s had a thing for Lance for a while but.. That’s something for you two to work out. Sorry, dude.” Hunk finishes with a shake of his head, releasing his grip on Keith and going back to the lion and continuing work as if he hadn’t stopped at all.  
  
     Keith leaves with a small wave and more answers than before, but the bile rising in his throat is a more pressing concern as he unleashes his frustration on a poor tree off the beaten path he used to visit with Lance, coming away with bloody knuckles and a heavy heart.  
  
     When Shiro finally gathered the nerve to admit to what was going on between him and Lance, at least to Keith, he called during Keith's lunch break at the auto shop. He had thought knowing before he was told would ease the sharp pain in his chest when Shiro told him, lessen the heartache and thoughts of not being enough. Needless to say, there was a lot more expletives spat out as he worked on engines, losing his focus enough times to be sent home early and seething.  
  
     If they had just told him. Instead of keeping… This, whatever this was, under wraps for so long. At least a month had passed since he had found out from Hunk, since dropping out of college during the Spring quarter due to disciplinary issues, and avoiding Shiro and Lance at every turn. As it played out, avoiding the closest thing one had to a brother was harder than he had thought while within the same circle of friends. Insisting he was happy for the two of them when Lance eventually informed him of it as well, during a lunch ‘date’, Keith couldn’t deny the anger that ran through his veins every time he thought back on it, a bittersweet nostalgia on what could have been and the truth that leaves him cold. The explanation Shiro had offered was lackluster, a word vomit Keith couldn’t be bothered to remember if he tried. He didn’t want to. It was easier to be mad, seeing Shiro as betraying him when he knew how Keith felt about Lance. Had felt for Lance.  
  
     That too had changed.  
  
     They were still friends. Nothing could break those bonds entirely, but Keith can’t help but think bitterly back on his experience, the awkward dance the two of them and Keith engaged in for far too long. The rhythm had stopped and Keith was more than content to leave them be with only distant memories at the back of his mind, and a reminder that change (and Lance McClain) is not something Keith Kogane is entirely fond of.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and critique are always welcome!  
> I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday-- thanks for sticking around!


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